maniccupcake.net

I’m sorry I’ve been neglecting this blog..I promise I have good reasons.

I just can’t tell you why yet because I don’t want to fucking jinx it. It’s driving me insane. I’m so excited about so many things but I have to bottle it all up and I think I’m about to burst.

All right…all right. I see you lifting that brow and the thoughtful look. You want a hint, don’t you? Never!

All right…all right..here this is all I can say: Wild things are about to happen.

Take what you will from that. I’ll make some big announcements once I know everything is going to happen 100%..all I have to say about it until then is EEEEEIIIIIIIII!!!

When you start clearing about 100 spam comments out of your inbox every 3 days does that mean you’ve hit the bloggy big times? I doubt it, but a girl can dream, n’est pas.

I mean really, every time my phone lights up telling me to moderate a comment I go from jumping up and down, to wanting to throw my phone across a room once I realize that the comments are all spam.

FUCK YOU SPAMMERS.

Those comments break my little heart. I want nothing more than to be super popular on the interwebs, and every little spam comment breaks my heart more.

Yes folks, I hope to someday truly win the interwebs.

So I told him I wouldn’t do this, but I’m linking the exes blog. A series of incidents has made me realize I don’t really care if it pisses him off, or leads him back to my blog. The incidents are as follows:

I wished him a happy birthday almost a month ago. I was being nice. I’ve always wanted to try remaining friends. The fact that he can’t get over it after he broke up with me and decided that he made a mistake is not my issue. Obviously he made a mistake, I am fucking amazing. He proceeded to ream me out for saying happy birtday, then wrote on his blog that I was obviously a cunt and was trailing him along for ego strokes.

Uh hi buddy, I don’t need your ego strokes. I still care about you even though you’re probably the world’s largest douche, but whatever. Exsqueeze me for being nice. I assure you, that will not be happening again. I still have high five on my case, my awesome boyfriend (who I seriously love to death, despite his few short comings) and other dudes. I don’t need any ego strokes and honestly, being hit on makes me uncomfortable.

I also apologized for some stuff I put him through right at the end of our relationship. It was basically my current situation in reverse. Now I know how incredibly stressful it must have been. That’s another big reason why I texted him. But yes, I am an awful awful person.

I read his blog today and it turns out “Benefits Girl” (his main “girl”) is also into modelling. He mentioned how when we were together I was into the same thing because I wanted attention. Uh no. I didn’t pursue any photographers, they pursued me. I did two shoots before he and I got together and I stopped when we began dating because it made him uncomfortable. That’s just how I am. I accommodate and I do whatever I can to make my partner 100% comfortable. I even stopped talking to a majority of my male friends.

It’s been super awesome that the beau isn’t insecure like that. I’ve never been a cheater, and i never will. I get plenty of attention at home. The modelling is just a hobby, and extra money. I don’t go taking my clothes off or approaching photographers. I wait for them to contact me.

So yes. A huge attention whore. That’s me. Also, this girl of his signed up with the same agency as me (if it is who I think it is) and its hilarious and awkward when we run into each other. I don’t know if she even knows who I am. I do remember being incredibly wary of her when the ex and I broke up because they hung out a bit and he and I were still talking (read boning)

Always trust your gut ladies.

Anyway, his whole blog makes me out to be the bad guy and there’s even a few comments where people say how awful I am. It was funny at first, now it’s just offensive and hurts a tiny bit. Especially since he knows i read his blog. And dammit I can’t stop. It’s like a car crash you can’t turn away from.

It takes every ounce of my being not to comment on his blog and say, “Yes. I am a huggeee attention whore. Yet you’re the one wheeling 3 or 4 different women at the same time. Mmmhmmm.”

He is on the other hand, a very gifted writer. He has a decent following and he really knows how to spin a story and captivae the reader, I’ll give him props for that. If you feel like watching the wreckage and reading about his taking the ladies on his roster along for the ride you can find him at:

behindthephd.blogspot.com

Court wasn’t do bad. I was honestly expecting to get my head ripped off and feel like a steaming pile of shit. But no, the lawyer was very nice and as soon as I stated I was filing for bankruptcy he told the judge to adjourn the whole thing.

Load off my back.

This month is proving to shape up as a busy one. I have three photo shoots..on is this Sunday, down by the river and in a big fountain that is also by the riverfront. I’m thinking of using balloons or something. What can I say? I’m a child at heart.

I have another shoot on the 26th and i need a theme. I’m thinking of doing the 7 deadly sins (not like they did it ANTM, that would be lame). I’ll have to talk bad boy into posing with me for the lust shot. I know he wouldn’t want another dude there. Any theme ideas you folks would like to see? I’m not very good at coming up with this shit.

I also have a car wash I told High Five I’d help out with for his band. They need to raise money for their new album. I’m a sucker, I know. Between work and hobbies this will be busy!

I might even have some  paid modelling work coming up. Cross your fingers!

“Model” Me:

Regular Me:

Sometimes I wear extensions. So there you have it folks. Me.

Ps-There’s a new link section for places I network at. Feel free to add me to facebook, and check out my portfolios on the other sites.

Customer:”Do you like Carebears?”
Me: Uh..yes I do.(as I awkwardly pull up my pants)
Customer’s Girlfriend: Were you just looking at her butt?!
Customer: No! I was looking at her tattoo!
Customer’s Girlfriend: Which is on her butt!!

Hilarious. And awkward.

I just stole a sale from a cellular company down the hallway. I wasn’t even nice about it. I was just my smartass self, and these people ate it up.

Where’s KooDoo? i told them it didn’t matter, because I’d take good care of them. Normally at this point people tell me to fuck off and walk away.

Not this family. They ate it up, and then shit it out on my floor. Not only did I steal a sale, but I convinced them to sign a contract instead of going on pre paid.

I am awesome.

Coming soon:

-pics from photoshoots
-girl hot vs guy hot
-men are from mars, women are from venus

I’m alive. I’m alive.

Things have just been super busy lately with Easter, family birthdays, and preparing for two (!!!) photo shoots in the coming week.

So I’ve been running around trying to get all my materials for Monday’s shoot. It’s very goth chic. Is that even possible?

Shoes are a problem. I want some big black skull stompers. I can’t find any though. High Five has a pair I can borrow, but helloooo too big! I’m wondering if big would suit the look or not.

Another option is to buy my own (and then return them because I am evil) or a pair of bright coloured Chuck Taylor’s might work? I’ve always wanted a pink pair anyway.

Also make up. Do I do a smokey eye? Or a smokey eye with running make up? Every other shoot I’ve done I’ve had someone else doing my hair and make up. Sigh. I’m super psyched though and I can’t wait to see how the pictures turn out.

ps-Vlog soon, I promise.

pps-I had a bra fitting yesterday and they grew. Ugh. If I ever want a proper fitting bra it’s going to cost an arm and a leg.:(

I just remembered a random Blackberry Messenger Conversation the ex and I had a few weeks ago before he blocked me out of his life again. Really, what the whole conversation came down to is morale.

I’ve stated it before Bad Boy/The Boyfriend and I were on shaky ground at first and I was treading lightly because his ex happened to be a very good friend of mine several years ago. The kind of friend you’re incredibly close to, but they move or you do, and schedules just never mesh so you fall out of touch.

We’ve made plans so many times to do coffee when we’re in the same town and one of us always forgets or is too busy. So it came to a point..how close of friends were we?

Close enough for me to feel guilty, but not close enough for me not to date her ex. Does that make me a bad person? Maybe. But my case points:

1. They broke up like 5 years ago
2. She ended it
3. I lurved him in highschool (Dibs dammit!)
4. There was some questionable behavior at the end of their relationship

So the beau and I agreed to move forward, and if it became a problem, whatevs our own happiness is most important. So what if that’s selfish? I still don’t know if she knows, but I can only assume since he was living with her best friend when we started dating and he moved in with me.

What does this have to do with the ex you ask? Back when we were on “friendly” terms he asked me for some advice. Both because I honestly didn’t know what to do, and because he wanted to take a jab and see how I’d react (or so I assume)

Basically someone we’re both acquaintances with is in a long distance relationship. The other person in this relationship lives in our current city and after flirting with my ex, basically offered herself to him. He asked me what he should do.

Right off the bat I was appalled. Not only would you bang someone’s significant other, knowing they’re in a relationship, but you’d still do it if you knew the person in question?!?! I told him such, and asked him never to ask me for advice like that again, because holy shit that made me uncomfortable.

On the other hand I was like…“Wait a minute..” because really, is what I’m doing any better? My ex told me I wasn’t, and that dating a friend’s ex was awful. At least I can admit when I realize I’m being a hypocrite.

I’m at work..as I always am. Eat sleep work. Eat sleep work. I don’t know how I even find time for sex anymore! (though I do, obvs)

There are screaming children everywhere and it’s really grating on my nerves. Any one who has spoken to me for more than ten minutes knows I hate children. I don’t care how cute they are with their dimples, fat fingers and baby smell., the minute they open their little pie holes and start screaming I want to kill someone.

So unfortunately my minions (this is what i call my employees..yes to their faces) are the ones that have to deal with my wrath. I’ve left a pretty passive aggressive note they all need to sign telling them sales need improving, etc.

Hell, yesterday was my day “off” and I had to partake in a conference call, submit a report to my boss explaining why sales are low and how I’m going to improve them, and do performance reviews on my staff.

It’s a good thing I generally love my job.